Pets Can Experience Grief, How to Help Them Manage Loss

 Written by our very own Dr. Morgan Kline DVM 

The loss of a pet is arguably one of the most difficult things we as pet owners must endure. We must face a huge change in our lifestyle, all while grieving our beloved pet. In many cases though, we are not the only ones who are grieving. Almost daily our doctors are asked about the furry companions our pets leave behind. How will they cope? Will they grieve? Should they be present during the euthanasia? Although we may not know exactly how our surviving family members will respond, there are some things we can do to help them.

Research in the area of companion animal grief is unfortunately scarce in comparison to studies on how their human counterparts cope. There have been some studies reporting on general behavior of domesticated and wild animals in regard to grief and loss, in particular noting that aside from humans, there are other species that exhibit grief-like behaviors. Species such as other primates, elephants, and dolphins have been known to show such behavior1. Anecdotally, many behaviors have been seen in our domesticated friends that have been perceived as grief. Behaviors such as loss of appetite, lethargy, and increased fearfulness/stress have all been reported1. This particular study referenced here discusses that these behaviors mentioned may be the result of separation from the other pet rather than grief from the loss. They aimed to decipher if there was a difference, however, were unable to come to a solid conclusion. Although they did not confirm which was true, this may actually help us in understanding our companion animal’s behaviors after the fact.

From my own experience, I have perceived many of these symptoms in my own dogs growing up. I can still remember my dog Maddie waiting by the door periodically for days after we lost our older golden retriever, Maggie. Maggie lived a long and full life, however when her body failed, my father made the final trip to our primary care veterinarian with her. Maddie was her little shadow. She loved Maggie and was with her for years, ever since she had been a puppy. We noted a lack of playfulness in her, more lethargy and many times, her waiting patiently by the garage door for her friend to come home. Whether this was due to grief or separation, I still perceived this as a significant change in my pet’s behavior. In hindsight, I wonder what an in-home euthanasia experience may have done for Maddie’s understanding and behavior.

Now, as a veterinarian performing in-home euthanasia, I hope I can bring this knowledge and experience to families who need it. Based off of anecdotal experience and the studies that have been performed, there are a few suggestions we generally recommend for our companion animals after a loss:

1. Allow your pet to see their deceased companion.

While each pet is ultimately different, and this may not be true for everyone, allowing your pet to see the deceased body may help. Animals in the wild have been known to stay with the body of their deceased for a time, however it should be mentioned that it has not clearly been seen in wild canids1. Although our own pet may not be able to spend a lot of time with their companion after, seeing them may be helpful for them to understand what is going on. The different smells they take note of may also help them understand something has changed. Remember, however, that our companion pets may not have the response you would have when seeing a

loved one deceased. This means that they may act no different or not be perceived as being aware of what is going on, and that is okay and can be normal.

2. Keep their routine as normal as possible.

In multi-pet households, the routine of one pet may be intricately intertwined with their companions1. After that loss, their surviving friend may struggle with such a change. Keeping mealtimes consistent, maintaining the flow of their day, and giving them affection are all important. Helping your pet maintain a normal routine can prove beneficial for them. It may also help you discover a new normal for your household.

3. Stimulate their brain and body.

Increasing your daily play time and attention to your pet may be helpful as well. More walks, extra playtime, re-introducing training, and even a food puzzle may all be exciting things for your companion to help ease the loss of their friend and keep their brain busy. This may also help your bond with your surviving pet or pets as well.

4. Give both yourself and your pet some grace.

From personal and client experience, emotions can be extremely high after the loss of our pet. Occasionally, animals may exhibit behaviors that are “out of character” for them, behaviors that we find inappropriate. Remember that they too are going through a great change, and these behaviors are likely due to their separation or grief. Giving them some grace in those moments is important for your relationship. In rare cases, should severe behaviors develop, speaking with your primary care veterinarian for further guidance or if medication may be beneficial.

While these are all options to consider, remember that every pet is different and not every situation is the same. You know your animals more than anyone, and all we hope to do as veterinary professionals is give you these tools as a scaffolding to develop your own path towards healing. In-home euthanasia offers an option for families to have a different experience than the historical idea of euthanasia in a clinic. Aside from a peaceful environment for our older or fading friends, it may provide a better experience for the companion pets as well. These are all things to consider when choosing the best path for your family. We here at Angel Pets are happy to help with any further questions you may have on navigating this difficult transition with your pet.

Citations:

1. Uccheddu, S., Ronconi, L., Albertini, M. et al. Domestic dogs (Canis familiaris) grieve over the loss of a conspecific. Sci Rep 12, 1920 (2022). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598-022-05669-y